Vanity, Thy Name Is Sally

On the subject of Spa Time . . .

Sally: When JB & TH come up, I think that TH and I are going to go do spa things.

Curtis: Okay.

Sally: I think you and JB should do spa things too. Like, he could get a pedicure, and you could get a haircut, at that fancy-man place in Old Town Alexandria.

Curtis: Do you think that JB and I are girls?

Sally: No.

Curtis: Okay, girls with penises, then.

Sally: No.

Curtis: I understand that you think that JB and I are going to go get pedicures and hairstyles and then skip around with shopping bags and titter, but that is not what is going to happen at all. We're going to go to a bar, and we're going to drink, and we might talk about stuff, but none of it will have anything to do with exfoliation.

Sally: Okay, fine. Can you help me with something?

Curtis: Most likely not.

Sally: I was looking over this menu of spa services, and I was wondering what you think TH would like best.

Curtis: I don't care.

Sally: Look at this list of four things, and tell me what you think we should do.

Curtis: This is all horseshit. I have no idea what any of this is. 

Sally: I think I might get the cellulite rub.

Curtis: Does that mean they rub your cellulite, or that they rub you WITH cellulite?

Sally: Forget it.

Curtis: Done.